Peeping Toms

So last night, Vincent and I did the coolest thing and yet it was the most terrible thing. We spied on our neighbors. Yeah, you can judge us--it was terrible. But, at the same, it was the most fun I've had in a long time!! And of course, Vincent made it even more interesting......

So I'm getting ready to go upstairs to get ready for bed when I hear Vincent at the top of the stairs whispering but very loudly "Carmelle, come up here quick- this is good!". I stumble up the stairs in the dark and am about to turn on the light when Vincent grabs me and says "No lights!" Okay....... He pulls me to the window that overlooks the side of our house and pushes me to the ground. "Don't say anything, they'll hear us" he says. I notice the window is cracked about 2 inches so I am thinking that no one would hear us even if they wanted to with the window barely open like that. Vincent is on his knees with his head turned sideways so that his ear is faced towards the window listening. "Our neighbors are fighting.....he cheated on her!!" And that's when I heard it. The sounds of a woman, standing outside, screaming at her husband whom she just discovered cheating on her. It's really terrible, really. But I will take any day of listening to it happen to someone else than it happen to me. And really, who doesn't love to eavesdrop to someone else's drama??

Well, right when it starts to get good with the guy trying to give his side of it and the pathetic reasons why he had to go sleeping around, our air condition unit turns on. That means that loud machine that sits right outside the window turned on too and we were left hearing NOTHING. Well, since our neighbors were across the street and not actually on the side of the house (why again was Vincent crouched by the window thinking they would see him if he stood up???), I went to a different window that was towards the front to hear better. Thinking it was best to get away from the dogs and the howling that would ensue from opening the window, I went into the bathroom to use that window. Vincent followed and closed the door after us. I slowly opened the blinds because at this point, if they turned their heads they would see us. (But, really when you're yelling in public at someone about cheating on you, are you really concerned about who is watching??) Well, as I slowly cracked open the window, I hear Vincent gasp in frustration and then move quickly to the side of the wall not in view of the window. He whispers "Oh my gosh, that is SOOO loud. Geez, you might as well yell at them and let them know we're listening with how loud you're opening that window." Then as he leaves the bathroom he says, "Obviously, you've never spied on anyone before and it shows". His disgust in my lack of stealth-like skills was overwhelming.

I continue to listen from my perch in the bathroom and am thoroughly enjoying this terrible scene. Well, in the other room, I hear Vincent slowly opening the window that is literally in front of our fighting neighbors. Then a few seconds later I here a huge CRASH as the blinds from that same window fall quickly to the ground. I look up at the neighbors who have stopped fighting and now are looking into our window that is void of any blinds and is open despite the temperature of about 110 outside-- pretty obvious on what we were doing. I go into the room and see Vincent plastered against the wall with his arms against the wall (because our neighbors would've seen inside the 2nd floor window and caught a glimpse of him if he had not been up against the wall like so). About 30 seconds go by in complete silence and then Vincent just picks up the blinds and stands in front of the window to put them back. I guess the neighbors were still out there because he raises his hand apologetically and says "Stupid dogs" and then puts the blinds back on the window and then shuts the window. As he turns to me I say "You're right, I don't know anything about spying on people and you totally do" and we both just lose it and start laughing hysterically. He said that the neighbors definitely went inside after that and now we're going to always feel awkward around them for spying on them. Oh well. It was totally worth it.

How is it that the little old lady down the street ALWAYS spies on people and her blinds never fall down in the middle of it??? Why do these things ALWAYS happen to Vincent and I??? Maybe it's because we always have a story to tell and this is just another story........